The Forgotten Past (Swan Queen)
by unspokenships
Summary: Opens after Pan's curse. Emma and Henry are living their normal, but fake, lives in New York, until one morning a stranger turns up at their door. Her name is Regina.
1. Chapter 1

**New York-Emma**

She woke to the sound of beeping. It was 8:15; time to get up, start the day, live life.

 _Hmmm scrambled eggs, pancakes and hot coca sounds great_ ; and with that thought she was up, out of bed, cracking eggs, firing up the stove and boiling the kettle.

She turned to see Henry watering the plants, just like usual. She smiled to herself, and took this moment to thank whoever blessed her with such a great life. _Why me? Emma Swan, nothing but an orphan, a lost child; why am I blessed with such a life?_ The ding of the kettle woke her from her thoughts and with that, breakfast was ready.

"Mom, you forget something?" Henry teased.

"Right. Cinnamon." She replied, knowing her son all too well.

She reached over for much loved jar of cinnamon and gave it to her son,

"There you go kiddo"

Clinking their mugs together, there meal had begun. She took a sip off delicious, hot cocoa-

There was a sudden, rather desperate, knock at the door.

"Is someone coming over?" Henry questioned.

"No" replied the blonde, looking confused.

Knocking again, but this time louder.

"Okay, I'm coming." She says, getting up, turning off the music and opening the door.

Stood before the blonde was a brunette. Their eyes met and the other woman sighed with relief, tears filling her eyes.

"Emma." She breathed; a smile naturally taking over her face, brightening up her eyes. Deep brown eyes that Emma couldn't help but got lost in. The woman took a step forward, waking Emma from the story she was reading in the stranger's eyes. Not knowing who she is, Emma quickly stepped away holding her hand out in defence.

"Do I know you?" she questioned.

With that question, the brunette lost all hope in her eyes, as if remembering a past memory. She breathed in, gathered her thoughts and said,

"Look, Emma, I know you don't remember me, but your family-

"My family is right here." She interrupted, even more confused. "Who are you?"

"My name is Regina."

"Mom, who's at the door?" a voice from inside the dormitory calls.

"Henry?" Regina questioned, looking beyond Emma into the room.

"Hey lady!" Emma rose her voice, quickly capturing the other woman's attention again. "You better start explaining yourself before I call the cops. Who are you? What are you doing here? And how do you know my son?" Emma, being the protective mother she is, questioned with increasing rage.

"Please Emma you have to trust me. I know you don't remember, but" she breathed in again, "we knew each other once, in a different world" she smiled, looking hopefully into those all too familiar green eyes, praying that this new Emma would understand.

By this point Henry was stood by the blonde's side, looking at who, in his eyes, was a mere stranger who had eyes filled with lost hope.

 **Storybrooke (before Pan's curse) Regina**

"Get out Miss Swan, I am not in the mood." Her stern voice bouncing off the walls of her vault.

"How did you know it was me?" Emma questioned.

Still facing away from the blonde, she replies, "I always know when you're nearby."

She sighs, "What magical spell have you put on me now?"

The former Evil Queen turns to face The Saviour. "It's no _magical spell"_ she mimics.

"Enchantment?"

"No."

"Witchcraft?"

"I'm a queen, not a witch."

Emma chuckles, imagining Regina as a witch, "Not a curse?" She questions.

"Of course not."

"What then?"

"Miss Swan, why are you so stubborn?"

"Says the Evil Queen" Emma retorts, positioning herself into the all too familiar stance that is Evil Queen.

"Stop that." Regina attempts, but she cannot help but laugh at Emma's ridiculous posture. "You have got it all wrong. It's like this." Regina says as she demonstrates with pure elegance, yet pure 'evilness'.

"Like this?" Emma tries again.

"No, no" without realising, Regina places her hand on Emma's shoulder and pushes it down gently. "There. Your shoulders were too tense. Now relax your hips."

Emma moves her hips to one side, _awkwardly_ , Regina adds in her head.

"No, no. You are really very bad at this Miss Swan."

With slight hesitation, the brunette tentatively adjusts the blonde's hips to the perfect position.

Regina couldn't help but notice how comfortably her hands felt on Emma's hips. She had never felt this at ease with anyone before. She never felt that whirlwind at the pit of your stomach every time that someone looks at you. She never, except for Daniel, felt anything like this, wait. Suddenly aware of how long her hands have been on Emma's hips, she quickly retracts them in hope that the saviour didn't notice. She takes a step back and says admiringly,

"Now that is an Evil Queen stance. Did I really look that good?"

"Oh stop it Regina" Emma says falling out of the position.

"It's not easy you know" The former Evil Queen retorts, "let's see you try that stance again shall we?"

Emma, without thought, naturally emulates the perfect position, and Regina half suspects that Emma was making those mistakes on purpose.

Emma adds a pout of the lips and now they were both laughing at the ridiculousness of what they were doing. Regina was suddenly aware of just how easy this all was. This relationship. This bond, bound together by Henry, _their son._ Why can't it always be like this? Why can't it always feel this easy?

"Anyway, how do you know when I'm nearby?" Emma questions, awakening Regina from her thoughts.

"Oh, I thought you would have forgotten about that." Regina sighs.

"Nope. I like to know the truth behind things remember."

"Okay, okay fine. It's because I put a tracker on you"

"You're lying." She immediately responds. "Did you really think you would get past the superpower?"

"No. But I just love how darn proud you are of that stupid superpower."

"Hey! Do not insult the superpower. Now, stop avoiding the question and just tell me."

"I know when you are near because- because…"

"Because what?" Emma questions again, desperation waiting to just burst out of her.

"You're my soul mate." She breaths, now looking at her feet; somewhat ashamed.

"But Tink said that the man with the lion tattoo was"

"Yes, I know but" She grabs Emma's wrist, "Look, a lion flower." Emma looks down at the tattoo she's had since, well, she was born with it. "But it's not even that, it's, it's, everything Emma. All the looks, Henry, our relationship that has built up and -"

"I know."

"What?" Her eyes look up in the green eyes she knows all too well.

"Regina, I know. I feel it too."

And it was in that moment that, in a world that was always on, everything seemed to turn off. Everything around them was still. Regina felt peace, like she had never felt before, peace in everything, anything; because, when she was with Emma, everything was better.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you soo much for all of the follows, favourites, and reviews! It really means so much. I didn't expect such a reaction.**

 **Anyway here is chapter 2 I hope you enjoy!**

 **Please keep on reviewing I love to hear feedback. Let me know if you want more.**

The forgotten past

Chapter 2

 **New York-Emma**

A million exchange of looks passed between the blonde and the brunette, all different, yet all the same. They were looks the two women had exchanged before, but, in Emma's new mind, they remained forgotten. It was difficult for Emma to decide on what to do; I mean, the stranger before her seemed harmless, but she couldn't help fall into 'cop mode' when forced into these situations. It was instinct. Natural. Chemical.

Breaking the strangely comfortable silence, Henry questions,

"Are you one of my Mom's friends?" looking between both women.

And without thinking, in the spare of the moment, the words fall out before Emma can stop them,

"Yeah, this is Regina." Her name feels strange, yet familiar in her mouth. "Alright kid, go and get ready for school."

"Okay, well, it was nice meeting you" the young boy says politely, just before walking back inside.

Despite the unlikely tale this _Regina_ was illustrating, Emma couldn't help but feel as if, as if, some aspect of this might true. Something in her gut was telling her to _just invite her in. Just see what she has to say._

 _But_ maybe she only felt that this _tale_ could be true because she wanted it to be. She always wanted a family; parents, people who care about her. ' _Naivety will get you nowhere Emma',_ she hears the mocking tone of the other foster children echo in her head.

"Emma?" Regina questions with a soft, somewhat inquisitive, voice. She takes a step closer.

"Hey!" Emma says awake from her thoughts; thoughts that haven't entered her mind for years. "That was not an invitation into my home. I just needed to get rid of Henry." With a sigh her arms fold and says, "Now, explain."

"So this is going to sound crazy, but you have a family, people who care about you. People who, who" she takes a deep breath, "who love you."

' _Naivety will get you nowhere' the voice echoes._

 _She is talking about 'the people who abandoned you; those people don't love you. How could they; they gave you up.'_

"I know you won't let yourself believe it, but I can tell you know somethings off. I know you Emma; use your superpower, know I'm telling the truth."

A pause, she was thinking, "Just because something is true doesn't make it real"

"Since when did you get all philosophical Miss Swan?" Regina says, reverting to her natural self around the old Emma.

' _No one will ever love you, blonde.' The voice spits._

"My family? Miss Swan? People who love and care about me? That's complete bullshit! No one has ever been there for me! No one ever cared enough for me."

A pause. "I care."

"So where were you when I needed you?" Emma's voice is stern.

Silence. Emma felt as though she were back in the white room she used trap herself in. A room of nothingness. Not only is there an absence of things, there is an absence of yourself, you are a mere spirit drifting through nothingness. A ghost. Invisible.

She hadn't been in there since the moment she held Henry in her arms; and now that this woman has turned up at her door, she is submerging back into the void of the room. She hated the room. It was reminder of her past; being an orphan, rejection after rejection, Neal, prison, pregnancy, everything leading up to Henry. When Henry came into her life the white room vanished. He brought colour back to everything; he allowed her to break down the walls, but now,

"I'm sorry that I was never there for you in the past Emma. But I am here for now, and I am asking you to understand. Please." Her voice was wrung with sincerity, "Here" she held out a small blue vile, "If you drink this, you will remember, and you know that what I'm telling you is true."

"Drink that?" She questioned. She could feel colour draining out of everything around her, shw could feel the walls building back up. She was entering back into the white room. It was a defence mechanism she possessed. It was instinct. Natural. Chemical.

"I know, why trust the stranger at the door who gives you a weird potion to drink? Why trust a stranger who challenges all the you believe to be real? But I'm not giving up on you Emma. I will never give-

The door slams shut.

 **Storybrooke (before Pan's curse)-Regina**

It was two days since Emma and Regina had spoken; it as if what precious information they shared never happened. They hadn't even exchanged glances between one another. Every time Regina looked over at Emma, she seemed engaged in a conversation with some insignificant dweeb like grumpy, or one of the other dwarfs, whatever their names are. Regina never liked the dwarfs much, especially because of their fondness over Snow White.

Not matter what she seemed to be doing her thoughts would always drift to the saviour. But, oh, in the moments when she is most alone, they are the worst. It's like feeling all the magic she has ever created all at once; the good feelings, but mostly the bad.

It was 3.30pm and Emma would be arriving with Henry any moment now (she always picks him up from school on Tuesday's). After checking her hair eight times in the mirror, the doorbell finally rang, and Regina finally had something to occupy her mind with, other than fantasies of Emma.

Opening the door, Regina couldn't help but feel her heart freeze as her eyes met with those emerald eyes The Saviour looked through. She wondered what it would be like to see the world through Emma's eyes. She wondered how Emma looked at her; the Evil Queen? Mayor? Regina Mills? Or just Regina?

Henry ran straight past her and began climbing the stairs.

"Where are you in such a hurry to get to young man?" Regina questions.

"I have a big project to start." He exclaims with a grin wiped across his little face.

"What are you calling it?" Emma asks, just as curious as the other mother standing beside her.

"Operation…" he froze and then bolted up the stairs into the safety of his bedroom.

"He's been acting strangely these past couple of days" Regina notes to her soul mate correction, friend.

"Yeah I've noticed too…anyway, how are you?" Emma asks and Regina can already smell the nerves cooking between them.

"I'm okay, just tired, that's all." _Stop lying. Tell her how you feel._

"Have thought anymore about what happened the other day?"

 _Yes. A lot. Too much._ "A little." _Stop lying._

"Oh, er, well, I guess I'll, er, see you tomorrow? Same time." And she turned and walked away. And walked away. And walked away. _Tell her to stop Regina. Call her. Invite her inside for a drink. Go on Regina. Just call her name. Just say 'Emma'. It's not difficult. Just. Say. It._

But it was too late.

She was gone.

Later-Regina

She lay awake with her thoughts. It was 2:03 precisely. Nothing, not even Henry, could distract her from Emma. She tried everything. Cooking, cleaning, mayor reports, writing, reading, walks around town, Granny's, readying henry and bedtime story, even talking to Mary Margaret. And then, night came and it was time for sleep, but sleeping was the worst of all. Sleep was difficult to manage anyway, but, when sleep did come, all she wanted to do was wake back up. Her dreams were too frightening. Frightening in that she knew they weren't real, and, it was just another reminder of everything she didn't have. More like, _who_ she didn't have. She didn't have-

"pssstt"

Was that?

"Regina." She could hear Emma's voice drifting through her open window. She got up out of bed and walked towards the window, looking down to see that all too familiar blonde hair.

"Emma?"

"Hi, er, do you mind if I come in? I think we need to talk."

 **There we go! I hope you enjoyed that chapter. I certainly enjoyed writing it.**

 **Thank- you so much for reading. There will be more soon. Please follow to be alerted when I next post** **and please tell what you thought in the comment section, I truly love to read your responses.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello again! Here is Chapter 3. I hope you enjoy.**

 **Chapter 3**

 **New York-Emma**

 _Knock at the door. It was her. Again. Pleading. Begging. Hoping that I would understand._

Emma wakes up breathless. No sleep for the rest of the night.

 _Knock. Her. Again. Begging. Hoping._

Wake up, breathless. No sleep for the rest of the night.

It's been the same dream charade performing in Emma's unconscious for five days now; and all she can think about is that woman; _Regina._

 _Knock. Her. Again. Hoping._

 _Emma wakes up, breathless. But before she can even begin to attempt falling back to sleep, she realises she isn't in her own bed._

 _She gets up and wanders through the room, well flat, everything is so open-plan. It seems somewhat old fashioned. Timeless, in a way._

 _And even though she had never been in this place before she felt as though- as though, she had been there before. It felt familiar. It felt like home._

 _There was a knock at the door. It wasn't a knock like the others in her dreams. It was mundane._

 _Emma approached the door and opened it to find- it was her. It was Regina._

 _And, in that moment, where everything seemed to fit together, where everything had its rightful place, Emma knew who was stood before her._

 _It was the evil queen._

Emma woke with a jolt and gasped loudly, desperate for air. It was all a dream. And like many dreams, they fade, fast. Quickly grabbing a pencil (orange, but it'll have to do) and a scrap piece of paper, Emma scribbles down everything she can remember. But it was like trying to save draining water using only a fork. It was useless. The only puzzle pieces Emma managed to write down. Were:

· An old fashioned flat *including rough sketch*

· _Her_

· Evil Queen

But, no matter how much she tried to piece together those three fragments of this faded dream, she couldn't quite see how they related together.

Maybe that woman lived there? No that's wrong. Why would she knock at the door? Maybe _I_ lived there? And the mere image of the flat in Emma's mind warmed her stomach. It was the exact feeling she felt when she first held Henry in her arms. It was home.

As for the evil queen part… Emma just decided that it must have been a glitch in the dream. Besides, it was a dream. Only a dream. It doesn't make any of it true.

 _But why did it feel so real?_

 **The next day: 3:10pm**

Though Henry usually walked home from school with his friends, Emma decided to wait for him outside and give him a ride home. Something wasn't right, Emma could feel it in her gut, and the most important thing was making sure that Henry was safe.

Ten minutes passed and Emma started to worry. It was Wednesday, no clubs, and a detention? That was out of the question. Henry never gets detentions. Tapping her thumbs on the steering wheel, Emma observes, more intently than before, everything around her. The road was a lot less busy now, and when she saw Henry's friends grouped in a sort of pack walk out of the school gate, she hunted for her son. He wasn't there.

Getting out of her car, she calls out to Henry's best friend,

"Hey Liam!" he turns his head round to see the mother of his best friend and stops, "Have you seen Henry?"

"Sure. Right there." He says pointing past Emma.

She turns around and sees her. Regina. She was talking to her son.

"Hey lady! What do you think you're doing talking to my son?" she says with increasing rage, storming towards the brunette. Both stop mid conversation and look up to she Emma standing there, looking between them.

"Wait, Mom. I thought you knew her." Henry questions, feeling confused.

Oh shit. "I do. I just…"

"Mom, don't lie. I always know when you're lying." Henry says, smirking.

"Since when did you inherit my superpower?" Emma teases, hoping that he will forget about the woman standing next to them.

"I'm _your_ son."

Looking over at the brunette, Emma couldn't help but notice the pain smeared over her face. It was the pain that looked infinite. A pain Emma could easily recognise. Loneliness. She had a whole life of being an orphan to know that loneliness looks like that. Not only would she feel it in herself, but she would see it in the faces of the other orphans; all mirrors of one another. All orphans are faceless. They are just mere mirrors, reflecting _that pain_ between each other as though it were moonlight rippling over every wave. Reflecting the good nature foster parents see in themselves when they look after an orphan for a while. Reflecting away hope, because it can never infiltrate through.

"Henry, I just need to speak to your mother about something. It's urgent." Regina says carefully, conducting every word with attentive thought.

"Alright. I'll let it slide just this once. But only because I need to get home."

"And why's that?" His blonde mother asks, her voice tinted with curiosity.

"I have a big project to start." He exclaims with a grin wiped across his face.

"What are you calling it?" Emma asks just as Regina moves her lips with the same words. And as Regina remembered a distant memory, Emma was struck with an overwhelming feeling of déjà vu.

"Operation…hmm…you'll have to wait and see." He teases, grinning yet again.

Once Henry was out of sight, Emma, without thought, grabbed the woman arm a lead her towards her yellow bug.

They needed to talk. Now.

"I see your taste hasn't changed much" Regina mutters to herself and she sits herself in the passenger sit of the car. But Emma is so submerged in thought she barely notices.

Taking a deep breath, Emma pulls out the list she made earlier of her dream. Looking at it, it only now occurred to her how scruffy this looked. Now slightly embarrassed at the hieroglyphics that are her handwriting and, oh dear, that orange pencil. She looks between her scrap piece of paper and this glorious woman sitting next to her. She seemed too clean, too superior, too- perfect, to touch this.

Regardless, she handed it over and explained everything that had been happening the past couple of days.

The woman stared at the paper for a good four minutes. That is too long a silence to marinate between strangers.

Another two minutes passed and Emma _knew_ that her paper was no match for the pant suit. It's funny; Emma was concerned with the material, but not what the material actually possessed. I guess that's how she always felt about herself. She was always observed for what she was, and never for who. She was an orphan that was ' _too old, too tall, too small.'_

 _'Just. Not. Right.'_

She was never known for who she actually was. No one cared for the book of 'Emma Swan', because it was scratched and worn out. And because of that, no one ever read that book. No one ever _knew_ Emma Swan. Or even wanted to know.

Until now.

"So you believe me?" Regina questioned.

"What? No. It was just a dream."

"No, Emma. This. This is real. This flat." She says holding the sketch in front of her, "This flat, is your mother's."

"But- that doesn't make any sense."

"It will; if you drink this." She explains, again presenting a small, blue vile.

Closing her eyes, Emma says "If. _If-_ what you're saying is true. I'd have to give up my life here."

"It's all based on lies Emma."

"It's real." Emma says with finality. "And it's pretty good. I have Henry, a job-

"But it's not. You know deep down that this isn't real. Do you really want to live a life of lies? Trust your gut Miss Swan, that will tell you what to do."

"Henry always says that." Emma replies, and a smile forms on both mother's as they think of their son.

"Then if you won't listen to me, listen to ou- _your_ son."

Hesitant; Emma takes the small vile, looks across to the woman beside her, closes her eyes and drinks the potion.

She opens her eyes, and looks into Regina's.

And a sudden urge to kiss her soul-mate rushes over her.

 **Storybrooke-Regina**

"Schuch over." Emma whispers as she climbs into Regina's bed.

"Wait. Do you want to borrow some pyjama's?" Regina asks, feeling uneasy at looking at the uncomfortable jeans and red leather jacket Emma is rocking.

"Err- yeah sure. That wold be great." The awkwardness begins.

After throwing Emma some pyjamas, Regina is shocked to see that she didn't leave to change. And as she began to undress, it was evident Regina was flustered. She didn't know where to look. She opted for facing away, because, well, seeing too much of Emma may be-

"Wow. Regina you really have some fancy pyjamas." Emma says giggling with excitement.

"What are you giggling at Miss Swan?" Regina asks, trying to keep her cool. But after turning around and seeing Emma in her much loved set of blue silk pyjamas, and of course in the perfected Evil Queen stance, she couldn't help but laugh. It's not that Emma looked bad, it's more that fact that she had not look so much like, well, Regina.

"Weee!" Emma squeals, jumping onto Regina's bed and crawling under the covers.

"Really Miss Swan, you could be mistaken for a three-year-old with this behaviour." Regina states; sass dripping from every word.

"No! I am not a child. I am a big girl!" Emma whines with a put on child-like voice.

Both laughing, they are both now under the covers. And Regina can feel the distance burning between them.

After catching their breath Regina turns to lay on her left to face the blonde.

"Emma?" her voice is small.

"Madam Mayor?" Emma replies, with a slight mocking tone, only to turn her face towards the brunette and see the burning certainty in her eyes.

Staring at each other, both woman, for the first times in their lives, truly felt gravity.

"Why are you here?" Regina asks as if the words were wrung out of her.

Emma then sits up and, mirroring her, Regina does the same.

Regina was looking at Emma looking at the wall. That darn wall. The wall that had her thoughts and fantasies of Emma written all over it. And afraid that she was reading them Regina beckoned,

"Emma?"

The blonde turned to face her soul mate and said,

"To do this."

And Regina suddenly felt the warmness of Emma's lips on her own.

She felt gravity.

Emma was her gravity.

 **Thank-you soo much for reading! Please let me know what you think.**

 **I'll try to update as soon as possible.**


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